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My head is still throbbing from yesterday. I can spare you the details since Dori has already shared most of it in her recent posts.
It’s like I said before, “never assume, and expect the unexpected”.
I certainly didn’t expect that Janina’s results would prove to be worse (for lack of a better word) than mine; as was the case with Dori, too. At 53, I’m definitely a lot closer to having reached the age of falling apart, and I certainly didn’t expect to have the least difficult road with regard to this thyroid thing.
But what’s worse than not expecting it, is not wanting it. These are my babies, my girls, my daughters. I’ve lived more life than they have. I’ve dealt with adversity before. I can take this and a lot more too! For Pete’s sake, let the punches be thrown my way, not theirs. Isn’t that what being a mother is all about? Wishing for yourself that which you don’t want to see happen to your children.
I guess for me, that is not to be.
My sister’s biopsy results came in today. All nodes are benign with the exception of one, which is “inconclusive”. Anna Marie will see the endocrinologist tomorrow to find out what happens next.
Had my first followup with the endocrinologist yesterday; and will have my first post-surgical followup tomorrow. RAI in about a month with Thyrogen shots for two days prior.
Sometimes, it doesn’t feel quite real. A matter of too much too soon, I think. It can actually be a little maddening. At times, I have to calm my mind and remind myself that me and my daughters are blessed to be in the hands of such skilled doctors. We each came through a major surgery very successfully. We continue to get up each day and do what we would normally do. We laugh together. We compare and admire each other’s scars. We remind each other that we will be okay.
How lucky we are.
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